Gluten Pootin'

A friend came up with this witty way to, ah, talk about what is the, um, end result of gluten poisoning (or dairy or corn or any food allergy you may have):

Gluten Pootin'.

There is no good way to address this issue. It stinks to have to even talk about it.

But one way we know around here if we been accidentally glutened is, um, er, if we start sounding like an all drum band over here. Really unpleasant, for all concerned.

Here is something scary to consider. Some of you may have a very serious food allergy but you never get to the gluten pootin' part of this problem. For whatever reason, some people just do not show symptoms of this problem until it is too late. That sounds alright and certainly less stinky, right?

Wrong. You are headed towards cancer and an early death if you don't find out for sure if you have a gluten sensitivity problem and you continue to ingest gluten. Or diabetes. Or rheumatoid arthritis. Or liver and kidney problems. Or, or, or and the list goes on until we reach 300 possibilities.

All in all, I will take gluten pootin' over intestinal cancer any day of the week. My apologies to those in the room who disagree.

I did find this great link of information from a writer who found a perhaps more civil way to discuss this issue; she called it a "rumbly tummy." That works, but I bet you will remember gluten pootin for a whole lot longer than you will "rumbly tummy." :)